Smart Software Names Cookies

December 11, 2018

Tired of McVities’ digestives, coconut macaroons, and chocolate chip cookies. Tireless researchers have trained smart software to name cookies. Next to solving death, this is definitely a significant problem.

The facts appear in “AI System Tries to Rename Classic Cookies and Fails Miserably.” You can read the original, possible check the cv of the expert who crafted this study, and inform your local patisserie that you want new names for the confections. (I assume the patisserie has not been trashed by gilets jaunes.)

Here’s an alphabetical list of the “new” names from the write up. Sorry, I don’t have the real world cookie name to which each neologism is matched. Complain to TechRadar, not me.

The names:

  • Apricot Dream Moles
  • Canical Bear-Widded Nuts
  • Fluffin coffee drops
  • Granma’s spritches
  • Hersel pump sprinters
  • Lord’s honey fight
  • Low fuzzy feats
  • Merry hunga poppers
  • Quitterbread bars
  • Sparry brunchies #2
  • Spice biggers
  • Walps

And my personal favorite:

Hand buttersacks.

I quite like the system. One can use it to name secret projects. I can envision attending a meeting and suggesting, “Our new project will be code named Quitterbread bars.”

Stephen E Arnold, December 11, 2018


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